Book Review: Modern Romance

 I saw Aziz when he came to do a show in Washington, DC for his book tour in July. His flight was delayed so he ended up being an hour late but what was cool, is that he stayed extra time to answer our questions.

What I was really excited about this book, is that Aziz worked with a sociologist to look at love in the modern age. He covers many topics, from texting to online dating to how romance/love has changed due to technology. I loved that the book took an academic approach with references to graphs and other scientific data with the intent of understanding why we make certain decisions when it comes to our love life.

My three favorite takeaways from the book:

What I loved most about this book was learning the simplicity that dating can be, if given an appropriate amount of time. How the things that really make us fall for someone are their deeper and more unique qualities. How these unique qualities come out during sustained interactions. I agree, that there is something uniquely valuable in everyone, and we’ll be so much happier and better off if we just invest the time and energy it takes to find it.

Dates. When we go on dates, I know that we’re all just trying to find someone who excites us, someone who makes us feel like a genuine connection has been made and can be sustained. Someone who understands us, accepts us and wants to make us be the better version of ourselves. One of the interesting date ideas mentioned and to my utter delight, is to take someone to a monster truck rally. I found this refreshing, exciting and different! I would be thrilled to attend something like this, in hopes of getting a sense of our potential rapport. Invest more in people and spend more quality time with one person.

The chapter on International Investigations of Love proved to be hilariously insightful. Aziz mainly wants to visit Japan because he loves ramen but it ends up working out because Japan is going through a decline marriages and birthrates because people are not showing interest in romance. At one point, Aziz masturbates into a weird egg-shaped thing to make a point about the value of forming a connection with another human. “No matter what happens, you get a lot more out of it than you get from blowing your load into a cold, silicone egg,” he says.

Now, people want more from a long-term relationship than just security and companionship. We dream of finding “the one”, a person who can be a friend, lover, co-parent and soulmate – and we are prepared to keep looking for longer period in order to find that person.


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